Where's snow white when you actually need her?

So there you are, struggling away through your turgid verbage, and you come to a point where snow white's sole purpose in life (provider of smut and spice) is actually required, and she vanishes. She doesn't answer emails or texts or MSN or Google talk or her damn Blackberry, and you are stuck with something that looks like this:

secretdubai (02:38:07): how do you put your hand on someone's cheek to kiss them?
secretdubai (02:38:55): "he lifted his hand to the side of her face, his thumb moved/pushed/traced/smudged??? her lips. Then suddenly he kissed her, unexpected, sweet, fierce???"
secretdubai (02:38:56): HELP1!!
secretdubai (02:38:59): cannot do this shizzit
Jabber (02:45:31): snow white has changed status to Away
secretdubai (02:45:36): arrgh!
secretdubai (02:45:38): return!!!

So that, dear readers, is why there shall be no snippet tonight. Because Barbara Cartland is currently turning in her (doubtless pink-satin-lined) grave; any more and she will quite literally rise from the dead and wreak vengeance upon us all.

Tonight 2066, subtotal 12222.